Embracing Discomfort: A TEDx Journey to Growth and Transformation

embrassing_discomfort

embrassing_discomfort

“Most people today rarely step outside their comfort zones. We are living progressively sheltered, sterile, temperature-controlled, overfed, underchallenged, safety-netted lives. And it’s limiting the degree to which we experience our “one wild and precious life.”—Michael Easter (The Comfort Crisis)

Faced with the bright lights and eyes of the crowd staring at me, I panicked. Everything went into a blur for a few seconds until I remembered to breathe again for a few more seconds.

Then, as I started to get into my rhythm, the screen showing my presentation slides went blank. Then, the timer screen to my right, which acted like a guide so I could pace my talk, also went blank.

It was 2015; I spoke at TEDx Accra and was way out of my comfort zone.

My heart still quivers today as I recall that memory.

I was used to speaking in front of people, but this was a whole new ball game. The title of the talk was “Rich, Successful, and Strong—Yet Empty.” It was personal, and I would bare my soul before everyone.

I would admit to family, friends, and strangers that I’d been following the wrong values (mine and theirs) for most of my adult life. I would explain my new self-awareness and what was behind the recent tears and laughter that were now apparent within me.

The stakes had never been higher for me. I was in the ‘Uncomfortable Zone,’ one that either makes you or breaks you.

Today, we live in unprecedented times. We have never been more comfortable, sanitised or domesticated. In most of the world, our worries are no longer about our survival: Food, shelter and safety. We are instead preoccupied with higher levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs: Love, belonging and self-esteem.

We do anything and everything to run away from facing discomfort—we binge on alcohol, drugs, video games or sex. We have become masters of deception, seeking distraction to numb ourselves from suffering and failure. (Even though that is the only way we grow.)

We don’t want to be seen as fools or losers—We are tough, ‘cool’ and happy; we keep telling the world through Instagram and TikTok. We crave hacks, instant gratification and the easy path for everything.

Worse, we don’t even want to listen or hear about other’s discomfort, so we have become compassionless. We use social media to connect and maintain superficial relationships instead of listening and sitting with each other’s pain.

What happened to face-to-face relationships? Or even facing ourselves? We fear what we may discover when we get uncomfortable and the painful steps we need to take when we become accountable.

However, when we ignore our pain and seek the easy path, we cut ourselves from our authenticity—our best selves of living with more purpose and meaning.

We collect repressed emotions that somehow spread poison into our every cell.

Life is not an edited video to be enjoyed. Instead, it’s a mix of emotions—joy and pain, success and struggle, and comfort and discomfort—that must be expressed and experienced.

It’s the discomfort and pain that helps us grow to live a richer and more meaningful life. The famous writer C.S. Lewis said, “Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”

As the TedX day grew nearer, my sleep got more erratic. I would remind myself every morning that I had decided on it, was committed to it, and would give it my best. I practised my talk as if my life depended on it. I repeated it five or six times. I made my family listen to me practice, and then I went to work and forced my employees to hear me out as well. The more I practised, the less fear I held.

On the big day, many things went disastrously wrong. My talk was delayed for two hours because the technical team were disorganised. The stage lighting and the cameras had not been set up correctly. But I didn’t let any of that get to me.

Twenty minutes before the talk, I used what I’d learned at the UPW event to put myself in a positive state, reminding myself of the Robbins quote: “Where our focus goes, our energy flows.” I breathed in through my nose and out through my clenched mouth for ten minutes. I then listened to music and recited an affirmation that I’d explicitly prepared for the talk. Yes, it was cheesy, but it worked.

After my initial stage fright, I took another deep breath and told myself I would do this and that the worst had passed. All my preparations kicked in, and I spoke without needing the slides or the timer.

Today, with total clarity, getting out of my comfort zone on that day helped me in no uncertain ways to become not only a better speaker but a better human. In pushing myself to greater heights, I upped my game. I became more confident and willing to risk more for richer experiences.

We have all gone through pain and come out stronger for it. But perhaps you still need to name and recognise that event as the launchpad to living a more uncomfortable but rewarding life.

The facing of discomfort has become part of my life’s philosophy.

To live a more blissful life, we must all make it so.

A Guide To Practical Spirituality

On September 21st, I spoke about Practical Spirituality at the HIS EVERY ACTION Summit Web Series. I decided to be part of this series because I realized people have portrayed spirituality as complicated and even mechanical. However there is the need to let people know that we can simplify, practicalize and learn to thoroughly enjoy every part of it through simple forms such as mindfulness, solitude, connection, giving and receiving. I believe that learning to infuse these seemingly little experiences into your life will make it more fulfilling.

Click Play to listen to the full audio.

 

The Authenticity Project | Mo Issa | Africa Dialogues

The Authenticity project focuses on being authentic, which is not about being honest or working hard. It has a much deeper meaning—to live with a purpose and come from a place from within where our actions and words are congruent with our beliefs and values.
Find out why I’m passionate about Authenticity in my talk at the Africa Dialogues Conference.

 

Awaken Your Aliveness| TEDx ACCRA

Awaken your aliveness: The frustration of being rich, successful and strong on the outside is most often of the emptiness and disturbing void felt in one’s life even after acquiring numerous material wealth. Mohammed Issa, a Ghanaian entrepreneur and philanthropist explores what it really takes to be and feel alive! at TedX Accra.

Powerful Conversation with 12th Graders at Lincoln Community School

Lincoln Community School gave me the opportunity to have a powerful conversation with the teenagers. I always enjoy my time with teenagers, as their exuberance is always a reminder to how our life should look like and how alive we should feel.

There were some good questions, smiles and many deep in thought.

I discussed several Guideposts alongside Brené Brown’s book from The Gifts of Imperfection. Find below some points discussed during my presentation.

 

  • Be Authentic

Being true to yourself in a world which makes it so difficult to be that who you must be.

  •  Self Compassion

You can’t give what you don’t have. Start loving yourself by stopping judgement, self criticism and self doubts. Instead start being mindful and feel with others. Let go of perfectionism as there is no such thing as perfect.

  •  Right Attitude

Have resilience; the ability to overcome adversity and sticking it out. Be positive and optimistic and try to be resourceful connecting with people for support. Always find time to take a look at the mirror for a critical look at yourself and finally have that attitude of gratitude.

  •  Be In Action

Use your mind as your tool and let it serve you in focus and discipline. Take baby steps towards your goal and find ways to chunk it up so its not too overwhelming.

Action is the language of God and when you start getting into action then providence will come to your side.

Goethe quote: “Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius and power and magic in it.”

  • Faith

Have faith in yourself and the world. Acknowledge that you need to let go of certainty sometimes and embrace uncertainty using your intuition.

  •  Creativity/Self expression

We are all creative beings and we need to find out what means for us particularly. It’s imperative as that’s how our heart sings, that’s how we engage our souls. It’s our truth and fills our life with meaning. It’s what brings us alive. The world needs our creativity so we can serve it and that’s how success flows.

  • Play

Play is apparently purposeless. Basically this means that we play for the sake of play. We do it because it’s fun but it has no end result or gain. It brings excitement and renewal and helps deal with stress.

Laughter: This creates an emotional connection. It’s like we communicate together without talking. I’m not alone. It tells you I’m with you, I get it.

Song & dance: there is this spiritual connection of completely letting go, It’s full body vulnerability. It moves us emotionally and puts in the mood for comfort, celebration and inspiration. We give permission to ourselves to be free.

  •  Rest

Respect our bodies and their need for renewal as you can’t believe some of the consequences of not getting proper rest.

Less is more as we are brought by doing too many things instead of focusing on few things we love.

  •  Calmness and Stillness

Calm is creating perspective and mindfulness while managing emotional reactivity. Anxiety is extremely Contagious, but so is calm. Practice calmness.

Stillness is not about focusing on nothingness; it’s about creating a clearing. It’s opening up an emotionally clutter-free space and allowing ourselves to feel and think and dream and question. E.g Prayer/Meditation/music/watching  a sunset.